I greatly enjoyed your last letter and refuse to think about how we grow farther and farther apart with each passing hour. Physical distance, of course; our psychic connection continues to grow stronger each and every day. Your left foot just felt a little itchy, but now that I've pointed it out, you're trying really hard not to scratch it.
As soon as you mentioned all the weird banks in that fake town, I thought, "THE TRUMAN SHOW!!" and was already formulating a response in my head. I'm sure you can imagine the pure glee I felt when I continued to read your development of everything I was thinking and more.
Remember that one time we were talking about The Truman Show and then "fake" checked our apartment for cameras?
Here's a picture of my cat. (See figure c.at_3)
figure c.at_3
I'm not going back to Spain until September 22nd, so I've got a little over a month here in Gresham/Portland before my life gets objectively interesting again.
As a placeholder for interesting international stories, here are 7 funny/random things that have happened, are happening, or will happen to me recently, currently, and futurely.
1) While I was waiting at a MAX stop to go to Portland, a old bald guy with glasses (who looked quite a bit like actor Joe Pantoliano, but with less hair) stepped considerably into my space bubble and said, "If I gave you my name and number, would you like to go out sometime?"
I looked up from my new smartphone, which I still have no idea how to use, and said, "Um. No. Sorry."
And he said, "Ok," and walked away.
If I never find love, this may be the moment I always look back on and ask myself, 'what if...?'
2) I got my very first smartphone ever and I have never felt less intelligent.
Although I haven't had much time to play around with it yet, you'll be proud to know I figured out how to place a telephone call all by myself.
3) My little brother's computer got a bunch of malware on it and pretty much stopped working. After spending a considerable amount of time on it, I fixed it without having to reformat the entire thing and celebrated by using it to listen to the Guardians of the Galaxy soundtrack on YouTube.
4) I saw Guardians of the Galaxy and it's the only movie I've ever gone to see twice in theatres. Given, the first time I went on $5 Tuesday, and the second time had a free pass... But still.
I'm just sayin', if Chris Pratt came up to me at a MAX stop, I'd be telling a different story. (See Image _beautiful.7)
Image _beautiful.7
5) My friend Alex and I went on a short trip up to Seattle to visit a friend, and right before we got on the freeway on our way home, his brakes went out. We were able to pull over pretty quickly and he took off the tire and bled the brakes to get them to work again, but during the almost two hours that we were pulled over on a very busy street corner with the hood up and the right rear tire off, not one single person offered to help us!
When Alex left to go to a hardware store to buy a specific wrench he needed, I figured maybe someone would stop and offer to help if they saw a young woman in distress, standing by herself next to an obviously out of commission car. Actually... I just wanted it to happen because it would be a funny story to tell.
Nothing.
A police officer came by on a segway, glanced briefly at the tire on the ground, and rolled right on by. Seattle lost points on that one.
I bet Chris Pratt would have stopped.
6) Also on the MAX, a sixteen-year-old boy tried to impress his friends by hitting on me.
I gave him the death stare until he giggled nervously and avoided eye contact for the rest of the ride.
7) I'm currently searching for a new pet rock.
Her name is Edna.
She can't just be any old rock, I'll know her when I see her.
There's a tiny spider named Ricardo chillin' in the corner by my bed. He hasn't moved in three days, but I don't think he's dead.
I'll just leave you with this:
PS: Remember how you said you'd be writing for SNL in the future? Apparently I'm more suited for Buzzfeed.
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